Dad, the Heptapus, Camping, and Anniversary

Tonight at dinner, as Dad was dishing spaghetti up for people right and left at the speed of light, one of the kids remarked how it was like Dad has six arms.  What a man!  We enjoyed our traditional spaghetti Sunday dinner, courtesy of Dad, with a smoothie by Mom, created to use up the dying spinach in the fridge and the left over "frozen yogurt pops" that Hava had made two weeks ago using cups and spoons.  I decided that before they got too freezer-burned (and to get our cups and spoons back) we should put them to a new use: smoothie bolster!  Dad was very supportive: he has been dodging frozen yogurt pop bombs for the past two weeks and now no longer has to be wary of his toes every time he opens up the freezer.

It also gave us a chance to use up the bananas that Spooner incidentally smashed (with his rump, I believe) while stationed on the counter-top in time out for the slap war he started with his volatile junior partner in action, Zsa-man. Never a dull moment.

We just finished up the dinner time quiz so the kids are happily cleaning up...wait, they are all in the front room giggling and playing with walkie talkies with their dad.  It's all good: because of their time over there Hava has successfully figured out how she electrocuted herself earlier with the walkie talkies.  Maybe it was because they were trying it out on each other?  They all seem happy :D.

We are all back from camps from the month of July:
-Liliputian and Pipalicious had a great time, Lil as first time YCL and Pipe as first time young woman camper.  I understand there were a lot of great late night talks and water fun during the day.
-Chugger-dude and the Goob survived a week of scout camp: Goob as a first time adult leader and Chugger-dude as a successful finisher of his last merit badges for his Eagle...woohoo!  The Goob promptly apologized for his immaturity in years past to us and other leaders for having to deal with him. ;)  He's a good chap.
-The day that I started coming out of one of my dark episodes--in the middle of my eye appointment, no less--we received a call that Liliputian was in fact two days late for her EFY experience.  Unfortunately we had written it down incorrectly in our calendars and she was missing it!  After a frantic search for other options, we decided to leave mid-eye appointment and head to EFY.  Where was it, you ask?  New Hampshire...a mere 6 1/2 hours one way.  No prob, right?  Not really, but it was tricky getting back by 9 am the next morning so I could run Hava to her follow-up appendicitis drain removal appointment...with five kids in tow :D.  Whew!  Lil was incredibly chill with missing the couple of days: "I am sure that there is a reason that it happened this way and Heavenly Father knows what is best for me.  I am happy with how things turned out. I wasn't excited with missing all of next week when the family was finally going to be together again before we head out for Utah."  I learn so much from my kiddos.
We headed out on Friday night to pick her up.  The Goob and Chugger-dude were at scout camp at this time, so we loaded up with lots of seats out, drove to Vermont and slept in swampy heat on the hottest night of the year in the parking lot of a free park/rest zone and then finished the final 45 minutes the next morning to pick her up.   Lil was radiant, happy to go, and enjoyed our couple of hikes in her new favorite state: Vermont.  Yes, Nebraska has finally taken a second seat in her heart to another state.

Spooner is super cute.  "So I was doing a race with Wee-Wi (Zsa-man).  And I beat him.  At getting my clothes on!"  He is willing to try new foods finally and is all about making his "body machine Shiny!"  I am all for "cheesy" kids things like "The Body Machine" cd we play over and over and over if it makes my kiddos more aware of what they are eating and how important it is.

Pipalicious: "I got to clean off the stove top and it's shiny!"  She got her stuff cleared for our trip coming up: a sling shot, a recording device and a pocket knife.  I feel safer.

Hava: "I.............talked to someone in my class more.  It felt good."  She got her hair cut into bangs this last week and it looks super cute.  Dad calls her "Bangs."  She still always has her nose in one book or another, recently devouring "Orphan Keeper" and "The Rent Collector" and "Passage of Zarahemla" in one week.

Liliputian sent Dad and I on our way for an anniversary weekend last weekend. It was sweet.  We biked along the Erie Canal through a small town where we picked up a yummy dinner at a local diner/bakery.  We got to our airb&b on Ridge Road (Gasport, check it out while it lasts if you are local!), which had an indoor pool, an elegant continental breakfast and delightful decor.  It was a nice quiet evening together and perfect weather the next morning as we headed back home to find the kids playing Blind Man's Bluff around a clean dining room table.  I am so grateful for the peace that my family feels for the most part. Sure, they are normal, fight and disagree, but there is a lot of peace.  It makes me super happy.

So it's been 24 years together.  Quite the journey, too.  We have gone many places together, experienced a range of afflictions--external and internal--and worked together and apart on so many things involving so many people.  Quite the journey, indeed. Our upcoming wedding of our son, Lek, to one of the sweetest women on the planet is giving me much cause to look back at our own lives together, Q-dawg's and mine, and how it all began.  I am happy for them and for us. I am happy for the hard times, for the memories, for the lessons learned and for the amazing children that have become so central to our lives and our hearts.  Most of all I am grateful for what my journey has taught me of God, of Christ and of how They work with, forgive and love me.

Hava home and glimpse of our July

Hava just recently got back from 10 days in the hospital.  Her bowels and stomach weren't working properly after a ruptured appendix.  She wants to blog about that separately so more to come!

Little Zuli is talking up a storm.  It helps that she has a whole household full of delighted teachers and echoes.  She definitely has us all wrapped around her little fingers, which is making it hard to scale down her use of the binki.  She thinks life can go on with it available 24/7.  She can kiss through it, smile through it, talk through it, carry three or four at a time and even keep them wedged between her toes--much to her delight.  However, one thing she can do with the binki is live without it :D.  We are trying to keep it more to desperation on car rides and for going to sleep but somehow she regularly manages to escape the house with at least one binki in tow.

Speaking of escaping the house, she gave us a scare with some unanticipated consequences.  She has a wandering spirit, much like her kindred-spirit big sister Liliputian.  I watched her last night at a park wander off past a splash pad, park and swing set--all widely spaced--and just keep walking and walking and walking.  I let her go as far as I could take it (she was approaching a very little used driveway to the park we were at) and intervened.  There is no stop button nor goal that I can see other than to see how far she can roam.  To see where her cute little pink boot take her.    So, going back to "the scare":  we live next to a big park and a stream, attractions to even the most home-bound spirit.  And to a wanderer?  Intoxicatingly attractive.  It is like a moth to the flame the second that girl gets out of the house.

Well, one day we got home from shopping and I distinctly remember watching her go into the mudroom with all her siblings. I even did a vocal check. I then busied myself with cleaning out the van in preparation for a big trip.  A short while later I overheard a lady talking to Chugger-dude who had come out of the house.  They were standing in the side yard and I just kept working while I listened. She mentioned finding little Zuli down by the river.  The park was full of many people that day, too, so the combination of those facts was scary, to say the least, and I was super frustrated with myself that I had ignored the prompting before that to go and check on Zuli's whereabouts (a regular need).  Chugger-dude was handling the situation and they finished up as I prepared to go into the house.  I walked across the drive-way to go into the house and heard, "Oh.  There's your mom.  I guess she was right here." I did some kind of vague acknowledgement and moved on, still caught up in my personal frustration, knowing she was safe.

Well, apparently that reaction wasn't indicative of a good parent.  I found out a day or two later that someone had turned me in to CPS (child protection services) for neglect.  That has been no fun.  At least she is safe!

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Spooner and Zsa-man are like two little wolf pups: wrestling, teasing, nipping, and fighting...and even howling.  Spooner really knows how to poke and Zsa-man confirmed the other day that he is strong.  Stronger than his friends and brother (which is true) and he likes it.  And when he gets angry, he likes feeling strong.  He is super emotional and tender so you can imagine a large part of our day is spent doing damage control: normally after Spooner has pushed buttons (sometimes unintentionally) I find him running for his life with Zsa-man wielding a battle-like expression and sometimes a weapon (once it was a huge flour bucket) and sometimes no more than his terrifying fist.  Yesterday they spent time out sitting on the countertops staring at each other.

Spooner is also super, super sweet, loving to cuddle on my lap and tell me all sorts of things.  And correct my words when I misspeak.  Hmmm....

Zsa-man particularly liked the Hill Cumorah Pageant when we visited it last weekend.  When he saw the actor portraying the Savior during His visit to the people of ancient America, Zsa-man turned to me and said, "I want to go to Jesus!"  He saw all the little stage children going up to his Big Brother and wanted to join them.  So sweet and tender!

On a side note, leaving from the parking lot after Pageant always takes a long time, but this time seemed moreso than usual.  We jammed to little kid music with the windows down, interior lights on, dancing and singing.  Zsa-man and Zuli loved it until they passed out (blessedly) when we finally got moving about 30 minutes later.

I was able to volunteer for Pageant and took Papaya with me, which gave us some special time together and her time to explore.  She had a hard time with Hava and I gone to the hospital for so long (I stayed the whole time) and it was good to spend some one on one time together.  She made friends quickly like she always does, with her eager and enthusiastic spirit.  She reminds me so much of myself:  a little bit overenthusiastic and abrasive at times, but always sincere and with a loving intent.  A lot of people just don't get us but at least I can understand her because of it.

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The home crew of Liliputian, the Goob, Pipalicious and Chugger-dude were awesome.  For the first week I think it was mostly Liliputian nurturing the kiddos (although Chugger-dude is a great back up and comic relief, playing exuberantly with the kids and bringing so much joy) and Pipalicious did a lot of cleaning.  The Goob manfully took on making breakfast and cleaning it up but then spent most of the time spending time with his cousins before one of them left to coding camp in NYC for the summer.   They celebrated the 4th of July taking care of the cows (a local farm job the older kids have), picnicking at Yates park on Lake Ontario and watching incredible fireworks in Lyndonville, topped only by the Hungarian ones off of a bridge over the Danube, according to Q-dawg.  Hava and I watched an endless variety from a distance from our luxury suite on the 11th floor of the children's hospital in Buffalo and I was surprised to find how much more I like fireworks when you are right under them, like in Lyndonville. I may have seen more, but it just wasn't the same...maybe without family to enjoy them, it makes a difference.  It was a bad time for Hava, right before they decided to put in a drain to an abscess in her gut, so she was on heavy meds, throwing up everything and trying to forget she was alive by watching hundreds of movies.  (Almost.)  It was good.

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So now the Goob and Chugger-dude are at scout camp.  Liliputian and Pipalicious had their's last week and loved it, Liliputian as YCL and Pipalicious as a first year camper.  The boys took care of the little ones with surprising care, even taking great pains to get the house clean for us when we came home last Wednesday. It was the Goob's 18th birthday, too, so happy birthday, eh?  He bought himself some cereal for breakfast and some yummy lunch things.   I was able to make him some dinner, which was something, I guess and a huge vat of tapioca pudding.  Yum!

Hava got her own personal Risk game from her grandparents and she has been having fun playing game after game.  Between that, the flowers, bears and other gifts and visits, it really helped boost her spirits.  She had to endure a lot of pain and she is very sensitive to pain, often anticipating it excruciatingly even before it starts :S. It made the whole experience particularly hard, but she made it! She even prayed at one point, "And thank thee for this trial so I can learn from it."  What a kid.

We are now preparing for Lek's marriage in August to Reka (accent over the "e") previous to their living in Hungary.  Avot has a boyfriend with whom she is considering marriage as well.  The Goob is in that hard limbo time of "wow, I'm an adult!" and trying to figure out the next step.  Liliputian is a balm to us all with her light heart and nurturing spirit.  Chugger-dude is just awesome.  Just love that kid.  Pipalicious is now released from "being a mom" and can resume all her fun studies.  She and Chugger-dude are rocking the Duolingo world with all sorts of records and goals.  Hava is slowly getting better and looking forward to getting her drain out of her side on Wednesday with mixed emotions (it might involve some pain :S).  She is happy to be reading books, being with the family, and we are all super glad she is here!!!  Papaya has created a cool wonderland for she and the boys to play stuffed animals in and I often lose them up there for hours. She is still the climber and regaining her confidence after years of correction and criticism from pretty much everyone that knows her.  We are trying to help her trust her heart to find her value and to follow it and respect and love her choices, which always have a good intent, even if they are done in a way that the rest of us may not like.  Spooner is joyful and loud about absolutely everything---except when he is running in terror from Zsa-man.  He burst out with all kinds of "wow!" moments, like when he recognizes a word or makes some kind of connection. Zsa-man is so gentle and loving with his little Zuli and trying to figure out how to live while feeling everything so strongly.  Welcome to my world, little man.  And Zuli can sense if things are wrong and is almost always the first one to offer a hug.    The little ones love interacting with their older siblings on Facetime, so we all kind of stay together.

Q-dawg is inspiring with his exercise and heroic balancing of being both dad and mom, provider and nurturer, for those 10 days.

And me?  Well, I am grateful for all these guys. :D

Quotes and Signs of Frustration

We had some fun quotes from kiddos this week:

Liliputian:

"If we let our questions lead to wonder instead of doubt, we would learn so much!"
It made me think of Einstein asking questions in his patent office. He must have applied the same philosophy: wonder, not doubt.

What Eli and Liesl do when they get mad:

The ultimate sign of Liesl's frustration and anger is the throwing of her binki (her most precious possess) usually at someone's face

The ultimate sign of Elijah's frustration and anger is that he will threaten to pull his pants and underwear down. Not sure where he got that one!

The other night during scriptures, Xai listened in wonder as his brother's name was found in the scriptures: Drew!! He was tickled. Quinn took the opportunity to have fun with names and homonyms:

Mary, merry and marry

Piper, someone who pipes.

It went on for a few minutes when Maia decided to chime in: "Like 'Declare'!" The room grew silent. Ummm...okay? We went with it. :D Yes, like Declare.

Easter Blessings

I felt prompted to include this journal entry. It doesn't have the usual modifications of names...

Blessings:

Yesterday, Drew was in a fender bender where he was at fault and which broke our van to the point we cannot drive it. He is okay, will pay for the damages we are responsible for fixing. Because of that—well, actually, we weren't going to have had a vehicle anyway because Quinn was using the car for the Super Saturday and Drew was using the van for driving pizza for Avantis (his new job—Piper and I walked with Liesl on my back to Tops to pick up some things for Easter dinner. I didn't feel very stressed about it...pretty lax, actually, that it would be okay.

But I didn't mind walking in the post-rain weather and neither did Piper so we walked and talked and enjoyed it. And the Redbox video was due. Let's go.

We got to Tops and no ham. Anywhere, well, except for slim expensive slices. So we walked around and picked up our other stuff. We asked at the meat counter and he confirmed what we had found. We wandered over to the meat section and saw an interesting kind of meat. Only $4.51. Could that be per pound or the price?? I thought. It was the price! And it was ham! A funny uncured kind of ham, but ham nonetheless. So we bought it. Cool. Reduced from $27, too. We checked out at the front and I was thinking about how I didn't really want to walk home and not one but two people I knew were there! Carol Schmidly ("shucks, no car seat," I thought) and then Jessica Durrant...who DID have a car seat! Crazy. God provides in abundance.

We ended up borrowing the Durrant's van to all attend the singles ward today too, because of no van and Kel was giving a talk and teaching the Gospel Doctrine lesson. Super! Then they invited us to their overly abundant Easter dinner afterward!!! So crazy and awesome and miraculous. I had forgotten to put in the funeral potatoes before we left and our oven is not working very well (it takes a super long time to heat up if it heats up at all) so I was kind of wondering how it was going to happen. Not really worried, just thoughtful.

And then we had more than enough and I didn't have to worry about a pan of potatoes in the oven!

Our fridge is filled to overabundance. We are all full and fed. So much to be grateful for. God moves in awesome ways. When I have a vehicle again I am going to deliver all the bags of chocolate popcorn I took home from the event and share it with people in our ward :D! So many great people that could use a little love and joy.

God is good all the time and all the time, God is good.

Right after Drew's accident he was pretty shook up. He said, "I think it was a wake-up call from God." Quinn is taking it really well and figuring he has paid car insurance for years and this is the first claim we have had on it so maybe it is about time we get some money back? :D I figure Drew can learn about forgiveness and "oops! Opportunity" on a more personal level this way.

I have been really enjoying conference talks. I feel like I am filling my lamp daily in preparation for the Savior's return. We truly can only fill our own.

Quinn led an excellent Easter "Come Follow Me" discussion today. I really loved it. The Spirit was so strong.

Today in the car, Xai was speaking unkindly to someone. Quinn said, "Speak kindly, Xai!" So Xai said something to the effect, in a really sweet tone, "You need to be nice to me and give me this stuff or if I ask 12 times and you don't give it to me, I will punch you." This from the boy who chomped through his Sacrament Meeting cereal loud enough to make the whole room echo...or at least that is what it felt like.

Bridgett Lau is here visiting for a week. Her mom, Kathy, says it feels like going to the temple when she comes here. I feel blessed that they can feel peace.

Running around; Loving kiddos

Yesterday I was blessed to meet up with Angie Moore at the Palmyra temple and we strengthened each other with our faith and hope and struggles and shared love and respect. The Goob was going to attend but had felt otherwise with all he has going on. He stayed home with Zuli and Spooner which allowed me to do the session with Angie I was hoping to rather than trade babysitting outside the temple like we normally do. Truly the hand of God.

It was a busy day as Liliputian drove home (to practice) from the temple, I called and arranged "eye" stuff for the Goob's upcoming surgery for his keratoconus, we hurriedly exchanged kids and then Lily and I headed to Zuli's and Zsa-man's well child check-ups. Zsa-man was classic healthy kid: purple markers all over the face from when he and Spooner decorated each other the night before (they were pretty proud of it!), dirt all over from playing happily with his little cousin all day, and food still smudged on his face from lunch! Super cool. We dutifully got some immunizations (a compromise between Q-dawg and I: we slow down how they get them but they end up getting most of them by the time they are 18) and then came home to enjoy a lasagna dinner made by the Goob with the sister missionaries. (Sister Woodruff and Sister Kinikini, the latter of which is just here temporarily before heading to Taiwan when her visa clears.) They bring such a special spirit into our home!

The Goob wasn't able to enjoy it with us: he has started work at Avantis much to his delight, and does lots of deliveries and gets lots of tips! He is super happy about that :D.
A beautiful and full day.

As I sat across from my children at dinner, singing our song that we sing before praying on the food, I gazed around. What a full heart I had as I stepped back and thought about Lek, and the full and wonderful life he has had...and that I have had an integral, front-row seat in that life. I was humbled and overwhelmed with love and gratitude for each of the amazing children that sat around that table, including in my heart those three that were not there.

Next week it will have been 16 years since Isaa-boo went to heaven. Thank goodness the hurt and the missing never goes away.

Last night I was trying to finish up the level of Hungarian I was working on and it was nearing 9 pm. I had read to Spooner and snuggled with him, Liliputian had helped Zsa-man go to sleep while rubbing his legs and I had rocked Liesl to sleep while reading the last chapter of the "Castle of Wizardry" aloud. Pipalicious and Chugger-dude had attacked the kitchen in the meanwhile and it shone. The older kids had started a movie and I was sitting in the room "multi-tasking" (doing neither thing well, lol :D!) watching the movie and finishing up my level on Duolingo. 

I have a new 9 pm. I put away the computer, said good night, made my bed, went to sleep.  Felt peace.  A good day.

Visit to the Doctor, Farm and Play

Yesterday was interesting and very different.  Early morning seminary was back at our house and it was awesome as always. These youth are just incredible.  Just incredible.

We had a breakfast of oatmeal.  When I asked Hava if she wanted oatmeal or pancakes she pause and looked at me. 
"What kind of pancakes?" she asked hesitantly.
I laughed, "Hava, Hava...you know the only kind I really make are wheat.  I can't handle all that white flour."
Decision made.
"Oatmeal." Lol.

We had an early devotional because the sunshine and the day were calling the kids.  It was about how crucial it is to tap into the Spirit for ourselves since deception is all around. It was kind of a follow-up from Seminary and I could really feel the Spirit as I testified that someday, someone's life may depend upon their ability to receive personal, direct revelation...and perhaps that life might be their own.  I love it when I can feel the Spirit zing it to their hearts. I challenged them to be ready and do whatever it takes for them to get that line of communication with heaven open.

The Goob spent some time applying for jobs. It is hard to move on with your life and be independent if you have little to no money, right? Smart boy.

Later that morning, Chugger-dude had another check-up with Galpin for his leg.  The x-rays are fantastic!! His right leg is at an 179 degree angle, almost a perfect 180!! I could tell Galpin was pleased. Now Chugger-dude can do some light jogging and then start weight lifting gently in about a month. 

See all those screws and gadgets in his leg?  Pretty crazy!  It is truly a miracle that he contracted the Lyme's disease so the deformity and bone spurs could be brought to light!  God truly works in mysterious ways.

Hava had joined us for more snuggle time (I can't get enough!!) and had her books in tow.  We thought we had lost them in the office for a while (we went back and forth between 5 different locations to wait and be seen!) but after pestering all the secretaries and heading out, we "happened" to look in the window of the office one last time and saw them under our original chairs.  Yippee! I was grateful because moments before I had just had a rare "Awesome Mom" moment and told Hava that it was no big deal, we probably had copies of those books at home (right, Q-dawg :D??). Normally I get a little feisty but today was not that day!!!  Woohoo!

I saved the feistiness for the way home, apparently.  We were almost out of gas, I was exhausted from waiting and driving, Q-dawg needed the car asap (53 minutes away) and after I got on the freeway and Chugger-dude plugged in the coordinates for Google maps, I found out it was going to be over an hour for the ride home!  And then, as I was communicating that with Q-dawg, I missed my exit!!  Running low on gas, going south when I was supposed to be going north, and (western New York) no exit for another 10 miles!!!!, well, I got pretty hot under the collar.  Shucks.  

Well, the anger did wake me up, which was good.  It was a miracle we made it to the gas station 35 miles later  (again, thank you western New York) when we found one on the way back on the freeway after turning around.  I wasn't deserving of that one, but God is good anyway ;).  I could see how I was behaving, which really doesn't make it better usually, but eventually I calmed down and apologized to my cute kids.  Hava had been so kind as to correct my speed at one point and Chugger-dude was trying to point out the right exit while I was communicating with Q-dawg and they both experienced the rebuke of a mom on fire.  Two bags of veggie straws and four bananas later, we had a full tank of gas, I was more awake, Q-dawg had had an appointment fall through so we were on schedule...life was good.  

We made it home alright, I read to the kids out of "Castle of Wizardry" for one chapter and then crashed into sleep. Liliputian had already put the boys to sleep in a huge bed with books on the floor in the front room, Zulie was asleep upstairs, and everyone let me slumber.  Heaven!

I woke up in time to knock down some family history (10 minutes and a prayer and I found 6 names!), some Duolingo (in which I learned useful phrases like "the Russian and German soldiers are fighting between the cities" and "the kindergarten teachers and airplanes are flying over the department stores") and then copied some beautiful scripture ABC cards from a friend for the kids.  Badda-boom-badda-bing!  Then I headed back a little late to grab Liliputian and Pipalicious for their work on a milking farm and the Goob for his back stage work at "Mamma Mia!" in playing at Barker High.

Oh!  I forgot to mention that I was able to put together "Lazar Maze" solutions with Spooner when he needed it while I was working on the computer too.  He had so much fun getting the lights to light up when he came up with creating the right path with the mirrors.  He is snuggling in my lap right now, chattering away.  I love it!!  Something about candles and using them at the church?  Cute.

The girls were there two minutes late despite a temperamental contact lens, thanks to the Goob's excellent direction.  They love their farm job and I love that they are getting paid to learn how to take care of the animals! I headed to Barker with the Goob, stopping by the Dollar General per his request.  I meandered, trying to follow the Spirit in case there was anything we needed that I wasn't mindful of.  I have been impressed by the current news that our recycling isn't being as well-used as it was before due to China's withdrawal from that market.  It has made me think about what I am buying, what packaging I am using.  Definite food for thought.  

I did find something providential.  Earlier that night we had been discussing what movies people were interested in watching on our Friday movie night.  Pipalicious asked if we had "I Love Lucy" on DVD since we were just watching things we already had.  We didn't but guess what was on top of one of the front bins at the Dollar General!   An entire season of "I Love Lucy" episodes!!  Heavenly Father loves Pipalicious!  It was out of place and left there. I couldn't find where it came from, thinking to see what season selections they had.  Pipalicious was super happy when Q-dawg and I got home from the play "Mamma Mia!" that night, having watched a couple episodes after putting the kids to sleep.  I was happy to make her happy, a girl that does so much to make everyone around her happy so selflessly!

As for the play "Mamma Mia!" I was impressed by the passion and talent of many of the youngsters.  As with all youth productions, I love to see youth that may not have a usual opportunity to shine or develop their talents perform.  However, I was super disturbed to see so many vulnerable youth swearing, speaking openly about sex and adultery, openly slamming marriage and having children.  It was, in my mind, a very "bent"* production: when evil is portrayed as good (and celebrated) and good is seen as bad or wrong.  It was sad.  Media and the art is such a powerful educator.  To have a stage full of youth singing about how they need a man after midnight to keep them company until morning, and "does your mother know" in a saucy way...Anyway.  It was sad. So much good talent misdirected to tout Satan's message to destroy the family.

God and mammon.  There is no middle ground.

*Media/Art categories, as I originally was taught them by the DeMilles:

Whole: Good is good, bad is bad.  Good wins. (Read a lot!)

Broken: Good is good, bad is bad.  Bad wins. (Lord of the Flies.) (Okay to read sparingly.)

Healing: Whole books that, well, heal. :D (Read whenever you need them!  Different for everyone.)

Bent:  Bad is portrayed as good, good is bad. (Avoid at all costs.)

Temple Trip in the Sunshine and the Icy Mountains

On Thursday we went to the Palmyra temple with my parents! We left at 6 am-ish and headed out, loaded down with snacks galore!  Hava and I even put together some bagel sandwiches like Tim Horton's has to take with us and yummmmm.  We got there with no mishaps and listened to a delightful Hank Smith cd on the way about "And My Soul Hungered" about how just like fasting with our bodies make us cranky and irritable, making our spirits fast can produce similar results.  Great reminder!

I hung outside the local church pavilion with the littles while my folks and the youth did baptisms.  I was pleasantly surprised by a text from Ben, Avot's boyfriend, and we had a fun "chat" (over messenger).  He is delightful :D.  The kids were delighted with the food, the sidewalk chalk and the over 50 degree weather that has been mostly absent from western New York since October of last year.  Papaya had loaded up the van the night before with kids' bikes, roller blades, baseball equipment...you name it!  She was awesome.

When the youth showed up, I was finishing up with Ben and the kids were all tramping along the giant snow mountain range on the side of the parking lot. (Still a bit chilly.)  I headed in for a marvelous initiatory session and as I walked past the endowment room I was impressed with the power that was streaming down from heaven into that room.  I am so grateful for the peace, perspective and power of temples!

We headed out after that.  The kids were doing great.  They had been rolling a huge black tube up a hill at the back of the church property and were rolling down inside of it.  Zsa-man wanted to do it one more time, but the other kids were ready to go.  We convinced him to go with the promise of food after Liliputian and I tried to help him and found out his ideal last roll included her, which wouldn't work, poor dear.

We had a delightful lunch at a local diner.  Spooner ordered "Eggs!!!" and ate nary a one...until we got home later.  Opa was merciful and shared some fries with him.  The other kids were in heaven being at a restaurant and polished off their plates...well, I guess Pipalicious kept some of her chicken wrap and Chugger-dude rarely finishes his big hamburgers that he orders now.  But they enjoyed them later!

The next stop was one of our favorite parks, in Egypt, NY.  Yep.  Egypt.  We passed through Sweden, Alabama, Chili (pronounced "ch-eye-lye") and all sorts of "exotic" locations to get to the temple ;).  I snoozed deeply in the van with Opa for about an hour while the kids were in heaven enjoying a mud-free park and sunshine.  Liliputian even taught Zulie how to go barefooted.  I found them at the end happily standing in a leaf pile, jackets on, shoes and socks off, enjoying the sensation of old leaves krinkling under their toes.  It was beautiful (I wish I had taken my camera!)  Papaya had done her usual work of befriending everyone she could and playing extreme tag with Pipalicious.  Hava was nice and cozy, snuggling with me every chance possible.  Love it!!

A good day.  Cleaning up when we got home was fun. I love visitors and the time I take off from doing deep cleaning while they are here!  I also love cleaning those out of the way areas that just need it :D.  Crazy, I know.  So many good things.  But I am enjoying learning lessons from the "Tao of Pooh" and learning to go with the flow, not stress and enjoy the moment.   It has taken a long time and I still have a long way to go, but in the meanwhile, I am learning how to give my stress to God and "wait upon the Lord." (Psalms 25 or something like that...last verse. Super cool.)

To top it all off, on the way home I was able to share something special from my childhood!  I used to listen to the following on a record player.  Super fun!

Great Day with Visitors!

Today we played lots of games with Opa, my mom sewed some more since she is feeling better and we squeaked by with a day of minimal housework and we are still healthy and the house is remarkably straight!

Lily super-cleaned the mudroom and it is SO refreshing to have a child that has a sense of making something look good.  She mopped, organized the boots, eliminated the extra ones for the MAAC and wow.  Super awesome.

Papaya and Spooner took advantage of the mildly better weather (it did snow today) and got the chalk out to draw on the sidewalk after exploring the yard.  Spooner sure needed it!  Wow.  He is a wild one lately.

And Zulie, well...she is still super teething or something because, wow again! She is sure whiney and noisy!  And cute.  At one point I had her (with her binki) and Zsa-man snuggled up on my lap while I played Apples to Apples with a bunch of the rest of the family.  The Goob is gone to his backstage crew job with "Mamma Mia!" in Barker and almost did an Animae (sp?) hairstyle before he went until he realized all the ones he could find required a change of hair color or hair in the face.

Lek, Spooner and Zsa-man are all on the list for haircuts.  I gave my dad a quick one today and got them all in the mood. And the Goob? He likes being compared to the character Sunshine in "Remember the Titans" and still has a few inches to go to compare with Sunshine.  He figures between military and mission in his future, he is going to lose his lovely locks so to enjoy them while he can :D.

We had butternut squash soup, yum.  But apparently it is unpalatable to Zsa-man.  Made his gag reflux kick in. This is nothing new to us, starting with Avot's gag-reflux to green beans. You just couldn't make her eat them because she would hurl them back up.  So he just went without treats and ate some applesauce instead.  Crazy.  Everyone else liked it though!  And my dad taught us a new way to serve it, German-style, with a dollop of sour cream in it.

We got to talk a bit with Avot (yes, Avot, we love Ben so far!), some exercised at the Y and dinner time help went along like a song.  I finished reading the third book of the Belgariad, "The Magician's Gambit" after reading "The Brave Three Hundred" about the Spartans at Thermopylae and a litle about Russia's history from a great new book we got, "Prisoners of Geography: 10 maps that change the world." Now the kiddos are upstairs "going to sleep" (there are a lot of squeals), Q-dawg is enjoying his cup of hot cocoa, Oma is sewing again, Lek is resting in relative quiet in his room and Opa, Liliputian and Chugger-dude are enjoying the latter's first viewing of "I, Robot."

And I am going to be in bed by 9!  Hopefully Zulie doesn't "sleep like a baby" like last night!  Whew. I could use some sleep :D.

FHE game: Mr. Boogety!

Last night we managed to squeeze in a game of "Hide and Seek Tag Base" for our family game and it was delightful!  Everyone goes and hides while the "It" person counts.  They do the "one-o'clock, two o'clock, three o'clock ROCK! Four o'clock, five o'clock...." and so on up to twelve o'clock, at which point they say, "MIDNIGHT!  Apple, peaches, pumpkin pie!  Who's not ready hollar 'I'!"  All to a rappin' beat.

Last night, a new tradition was born.

Normally the "It" person just starts over again at "one o'clock" but the Goob and then Lek started going up higher to "thirteen o'clock."  It was hilarious to hear them stumble over the transition from nineteen o'clock to twenty o'clock.  It might seem easy, but let me tell you!  Even the most seasoned counter might struggle when in the stupor of the post-awesome-dinner drugged feel combined with a house made completely dark.  (Oh yah.  Forgot to mention we play in the dark.  How else would a family of 12 hide in a 1200 square foot house?)

I kept laughing from my hiding place as I would hear them caught off guard in something so usual as counting, the cute boys!

I got to hide with Spooner, Zsa-man and Zulie, the girl with the glow-in-the-dark binki.  However, with their surprising silence combined with my awesome hiding skills in an unanticipated spot (kind of out in the open...it was dark, remember?) we actually made it to home base without being caught twice.

When it was time for Spooner, Zsa-man and I to find people, it went quickly with everyone until we got to Lek, hider-extraordinaire.  We made our way through every room until we got to one that had an unusually dark corner.  Since I had Zsa-man on one hip and Zulie on the other I didn't want to climb up on top of the bunk bed to investigate. I reached up as far as I could but could touch nothing.  After searching out the room a couple times, I asked, "Lek, if you are close, can you make a sound?"

I heard a distinct beep and it was from the dark corner. However, Spooner insisted he had checked the corner and found nothing.  We headed down the hall towards the stairs.  All of a sudden there was a rumble and a low growl as Lek came crawling out at break-neck speed to chase down the delighted boys.  I love my big and little boys!

Sunday Sickies and Skype

My parents are here and my mom has succumbed to the flu that is going around in circles in our family :S.  Poor dear.

It has been a busy and mellow Sabbath, filled with visits, resting (or attempted resting in Q-dawg's case with a fidgity little sick and teething angel), FHE and food.

The family planning meeting should be forgotten...nothing like trying to organize use of cars to stir up the blood!

Liliputian joined me for the first real time in ministering.  I initiated working together a few months ago but it wasn't the right time for her.  Today, after a great Laurel lesson, she told me she was ready.  After listening to two different ladies and their stories of their lives, she was touched by the extreme hardship so many others suffer.

Dinner was New England clam chowder with biscuits and other than the honey on my biscuits and the honey in my golden tumeric tea, I didn't have any sugar today!  yay for me!  After starting once on Wed, caving on Friday night big time, I am on day 2 once again!  We will see how long my will-power lasts.

Spooner's mood matched the weather as he blew like a whirlwind around the house until I contained him on the couch long enough for him to fall asleep :D.  Whew!

We skyped a bit with my brother Jon and his darling family where they even sang "In the Jungle" with really cool harmony and parts!  We have been trying to do that with a few songs and it is fun to see other families doing the same :D.

And my favorite part was that we had a great skype session with Avot and her boyfriend!  Together we like to call them "Benva," or so Q-dawg informed us all tonight :).  They joined us for FHE and Ben is quite the trooper!  It is fun to see Avot so happy, too.  They even participated in telephone charades, with a convincing rendition of tap-dancing and the morgue.

Busy Week and Company!

We were so thrilled to have Q-dawg's parents in town last week and be able to spend some time with them!  We went swimming with G-pa who jumped into the "death point" like a pro and showed the kiddos some great moves.   G-ma was her usual wonderful, loving self making us all feel so loved...and we all got time holding our brand new little niece/cousin when we were gathering.  Super wonderful!

I think one of my favorite moments (besides the hugs, laughs, and stories with the folks) was to see the Goob holding his brand new little cousin with tenderness and love showing on his face.  He will make a great daddy.

*********
Liliputian has her learner's permit and drove on snowy roads the other day to Aldis and back!  Whew. I haven't recovered from helping the first three learn how to drive so thank goodness she is super cautious!  She also suggested and helped me make a yummy sausage potato Italian soup on Monday...kind of like the Olive Garden one, but super different because I can't cook a recipe without severely manipulating it unless I exercise great control ;).

In basketball the other day, Q-dawg, Liliputian and Pipalicious  schooled Lek, me and a girl that joins us for ball at the YMCA: 10-0!!!!!  Q-dawg offered to change up the teams, but I said, "No way!"  We played again and beat them 10-9.  Yay!  Pipalicious is pretty aggressive at stealing the ball and even blocked Q-dawg the other day.  Go, Pipes!

Zulie is teething like mad and it has now been combined with a vagrant flu that has drifted into town and attacked half the family.  Fortunately it just seems to have the fever and incapacitate people for about 12 hours but since we have my mom and dad visiting, we are praying that it will somehow miraculously pass over their heads!  So Zulie has been pretty miserable and clingy and definitely not herself, poor dear.  Those back molars are making an appearance and we hope they will hurry!

The Goob is currently finishing up his Eagle project (pics on Instagram) and working on stage crew on the set for "Mama Mia!" in Barker for the play next weekend.  He loves anything and everything to do with stage performance!  He is considering Niagara University for a college since it has so many artsy things to learn.

Hava finished her first quilt top and crocheted a pink skunk that can be a sloth and can be a lion...and a few other animals I can't remember :D.  Love it!  Oma is leaving a little sewing machine for us to use and I am sure Hava and I will put it to good work!  I have discovered a love of putting blankets together using the gobs of fabrics I have had donated to me over the years.  Super fun!  The other day I came out from the kitchen looking for someone to help me and everyone was happily engaged learning or creating or loving.  Super duper!!!  I went and did it myself with a smile :D.

Speaking of smiles-- St. John's Wort and B vitamins, creating, "Mommy Calm" (Natural Calm), drinking water, yoga, golden milk tea, creating (intentional repetition), keeping connected with God...yup.  All seem to be helping bring some calm into my life!

Chugger-dude went to the physical therapist this week and rocked it!  Not only is he weight bearing on his leg now but is trying to be super patient before playing sports.  He has a doctor appointment next week to see how his leg is doing but looks normal except for not playing bball. He is swimming and moving around completely without crutches for over a week now.

Papaya is super cute with the boys.  She sings to them, plays with them, creates play places for them and dresses them up as very lovely and stylish ladies.  Spooner even came down garbed in a scarf with marker lip stick on the other day.  So cute.

Liliputian is lost more and more in reading.  Currently, it is Sherlock Holmes. Elementary, my dear Liliputian.  She still faithfully rubs her father's feet or head every night during scripture reading and hence gets to answer his "does anyone have any thoughts?" question first every night.  She also got 16 boxes of popcorn for her birthday, which made her super happy.

Pipalicious and Chugger-dude had fun adding quilting tacks to the bottom of their feet and tapping up a storm at the Goob's project the other day.  Pipalicious is just such a bright part of my everyday life and I love her!

Poor Zsa-man was laid waste with the flu yesterday and insisted on snuggling. I loved it!

***************
My folks came into town and we have gone to the temple with them, bound quilts and sewed up some dresses (my mom has :D) for Lek's wedding.  Combine that with good food and a few games, it has been great!

We had Authors in the Attic today dedicated to my parents while they were in town:

Hava:

"Red, Yellow, Pink and Blue"

Red, yellow, pink and blue

I love finding eggs with you

Stripes, circles, polka dots and lines

They all have their own very unique design

Oma, Opa--I love them both

Forever and forever I will love them both

So red, yellow, pink and blue

I love my grandparents; so do you!

The Bomb:

"Awesome like a Possum"

Opa and Oma are awesome

As awesome as any can be

They don't hang down like oppossum

But they both do so much for me.

Opa is funny with puns

He maskes us all laugh with a joke

And when we all least expect one

Our humor with wit does he poke!

And Oma, wow! Sews up a slew

Of blankets and dresses galore

Her cooking makes us happy too

And leave us all begging for more.

The Gospel to each one is dear

Their time in the temple first place

In their lives, Jesus always is near

And they both long to look on His face.

So hurrah for our Opa and Oma!

Who bless all our lives oh, so much.

We're glad that they've come to our home-a

And our lives they'll eternally...use their phalanges to...just kidding! Touch!

More poems when I find them...

Family Glimpse

Spooner is into counting everything and anything, number patterns and drawing letters.  He has fun being kind, obedient and helpful but also didn't seem the least bit remorseful about brutally killing Liliputian's fish Euclid with a rubber band and trying to feed it to their giant stuffed shark.  Disturbing?  I will leave that for you to decide.  He loves to eat fruit although he doesn't always finish it.  Between him, Zsa-man and Zulie we find a bunch of partially eaten fruit around the house, much to Lek's dismay.  Spooner is also obsessed with using knives.  I just caught him using a sharp, serated knife to bring grapes up to his mouth to eat.  Really???  You're six!

Zsa-man picked up something from a recent Sacrament meeting and is super cute about it: a man invited someone from the congregation to comment on what "amen" means.  A cute little 10 year old offered an answer, to which the speaker responded, "I love you, but you're WRONG!"  As you can guess, Q-dawg has picked this up and uses it multiple times a day.  And Zsa-man imitates it perfectly.
Zsa-man loves anything in groups of five (perhaps because that is how many fingers he has on one hand and that is a maximum possible in his mind?), like reading five books or eating five grapes.

Papaya is quite the fashion diva and is in heaven having found a pile of donated clothes left at the church which she sorted through for all sorts of treasures.  She has discovered reading, loves to serve up fancy places--like tea parties and blanket forts--and retains her brilliant flair for independence despite the opinions of older siblings.  Hurray for Papaya!  She has also started playing the piano and has quite the knack for sketching, having filled a few books already with artwork.

Hava has discovered quilting and continues to learn by leaps and bounds on the piano when she doesn't have her nose in a book.  She has quite the feisty-ness and had no problem standing up to her brothers, o-la-la!  She has discovered that she can be super fast on her roller blades and is very adept on them.  She loves family reading time; right now I am reading "The Belgariad" for the fourth or fifth time aloud but even the older ones still drift in to listen.  I love it!  Tonight she is trying out a new recipe since she apparently doesn't like most of the cookies we make (recent discovery on my part). 

Pipalicious continues to be my saving grace, a helping hand available at all times.  She is learning how to cook more and loves to help her younger siblings and goof-off with her older ones.  She and Liliputian spend a lot of time outside finding peace.  Pipalicious is trying out all types of learning and is having fun doing young women's activities and projects in our church. She is amazing at basketball and steals the basketball from everyone regularly.  She has a sweet shot within about a 10 foot range and has even blocked Q-dawg a few times! 

Chugger-dude got a lot of engineering sets for Christmas that he likes and is recovering well from his surgery on his legs and knees.  He officially went without crutches this last week!!  We are starting physical therapy this week so hopefully he will be up and running with sports again soon.  We miss him on the basketball court! He loves to spend time with friends and has had fun swimming with us, since his body can handle that.  He has been going sugar-free for quite some time with only occasional allowances for sweets with a resolution that is very impressive.

Liliputian loves to swim!  All the kids do, really, but she has particular fun.  We try to go about once a week and Zulie will just float on her back in the water or on her tummy, using the floatation device, of course.  Hava also floated for about 10 minutes last time we went and was in heaven!  Zsa-man actually will go into the deep-end without freaking out in my arms.  Spooner is just crazy and paddles all around in his floatation device. Papaya spends her time with her cousin when she is lucky enough to have him with her or finds friends all over the pool of all sorts of ages.  Liliputian loves rough-housing with her siblings and dad in the water.

Liliputian also passed her driving test to get her learner's permit this last week and did a great job driving around our beast for her practice vehicle.  After practicing with our "Millenial Falcon" beast, any other car seems like a breeze to drive!  She has been getting back into her photography, loves to rub her dad's feet at night still and is coming into her own as Seminary class president and Laurel class president. As the Goob says, she leads with gentleness. She is working on getting a six-pack and enjoys being Avot's confidante and reading Mary Higgins Clark mysteries.

The Goob is mastering the yo-yo, signed up for the Marines last week, may get his braces off soon and it madly finishing up his Eagle project.  He also offers regularly to chew on his little brother's toes and ears, much to their pretended dismay. Right now he and Zsa-man are having a serious conversation about what parts of the body the Goob can nibble on.  So funny!  I often hear him and his little buddies running through the house with roars and screeches.   The Goob is also most happy with a big container of food in front of him that he can slowly eat despite his braces.

Lek is gracing us with his presence temporarily while he earns money and awaits the anticipated day when he gets to fly to Hungary to spend the time before his wedding with the love of his life.  He is working at a local factory, loves to work out and build his massive muscles and play basketball with us. 

Q-dawg is busy between appraising, keeping in shape (running, working out, basketball) and trying to keep everything at home from flying apart :D.  He is always great with a quick joke and is great at navigating the dinner time humor somewhere to challenge my ability to digest comfortably.  (I have only left the table a couple of times, so it can't be that bad, right?)  He is also the Young Men's president in our local church unit and the boys like having him do that with them..most of the time :D.  When he isn't keeping them in line with their commitments anyway ;).  He has had quite the challenge over the years of trying to help me navigate emotionally and we are having more peace there.

I have had a friend help me see with more clarity some emotional core beliefs that I have held over the years that are false and that God is trying to help me let go by helping me see:
-that God loves me
-that everything I do isn't wrong
-that I don't hurt everyone I come into contact with
It is interesting how strongly we can allow our live experiences to reinforce false inner core beliefs.  Life experiences can be interpreted so many ways.  One thing I am doing more of is creating, hence our decision to let some of the cleaning go. I used to save creation for after things were straightened, cleaned and organized.  Straightened, cleaned and organized so that they could be used for creation...which they never were being used to do.

Elder Gong had some insightful quotes that reinforced what God was telling me, that creation is something I need to do: paint, write, draw, sew, construct.

Elder Scott said painting helped him observe and create. He has written: “Attempt to be creative, even if the results are modest. … Creativity can engender a spirit of gratitude for life and for what the Lord has woven into your being. … If you choose wisely, it doesn’t have to absorb a lot of time.”2

President Henry B. Eyring describes his artistic meditations as motivated by “a feeling of love,” including “the love of a Creator who expects His children to become like Him—to create and to build.”3 President Eyring’s creative works provide a “unique, spiritual perspective on testimony and faith.”4

So I am drawing, painting, sewing, writing.  As he says, it doesn't have to absorb a lot of time. 

I am also taking better care of myself: taking vitamins, doing yoga and exercising, reading my scriptures more regularly and drinking my golden milk (tumeric) tea to help my joints.  When I choose to, it really seems to be helping! 

Media Fast

So we had a media fast this last month.  And while by the end, we weren't all as enthusiastic as we had started out, everyone had agreed to do it and give it a whirl and it was insightful!  They all entered into it with a pretty optimistic, open scientific look at it.  It wasn't a moral decision, more the nature of an experiment:
-what would it be like?
-what would we miss the most?
-would it change anything?

What was it like?
At first it was really quiet.  There were a lot of requests for media with an "oh yah...media fast" to follow.  The requests died off pretty quick and the kids noticed they were distracted less by the computer since it just sat there in the corner of the dining room for the whole month.
We started singing together as we cleaned up dinner and the Goob noticed that clean up went more smoothly since there wasn't music blasting all through it. (His words.)  Evenings were slower paced and our times together felt more peaceful (to me ;D).

What would we miss the most?
For Liliputian, music.
For Hava, family history.
Pipalicious didn't miss the distraction of having it as a possibility.
The Goob was really awesome about it but I think he missed not being able to access all the things he liked to access immediately upon thinking about it.  The music was particularly hard for him.
Q-dawg said he was pretty much good with whatever, which is what most of the kids thought.
Papaya definitely the movies.
Many times we wanted to look up some bit of information but it didn't happen as often as I thought it would.  We would reference different parts of movies or youtube videos we had previously watched but it was enough, somehow, to just remember them and share the laugh or emotion that went with them.
Me?  I missed Yoga with Adrienne, listening to conference talks while cleaning, and music but also came to enjoy the silence, which leads me to the next part.

Would it change anything?
I realized how much the constant stimulus of music and media affected my little ones.  They started talking more and not just talking.  It was like their little spirits were given a little breathing room and they shared insights and spiritual truths that I didn't realize they would understand or articulate.

I realized that I really do trust and like my older kids' sense of music and media and their ability to select it for themselves.  I love the incredible media opportunities for learning, sharing, healing, sustaining and uplifting that my older kids use to bless their lives and the lives of others.   However, I also realized that I needed to moderate what is filtered down to the little minds to let them develop free from being bombarded from stimulus.  And the cool thing is that my older kids get it and don't seem to resent the little ones for it.

We are now using our media intentionally.  It is just not a default and they have to log-on to our computer using a sign-up sheet with their name, intended use, estimated time and the actual completion of the task.  Electronic devices are accessible through a password that they need from me to use for specific things and then returned after.  The older they get, the more unlimited their access. And when they leave the home (like at friend's houses and at the library) it is open season. 

The kids all seem cool with our new way of doing things and it feels right for now. I am sure it will change as our needs change!

Busy Saturday

It all started with that shoe on the wall...

Or that pile of laundry.

It was about 8 am and we sat on the couch and worked out the schedule:
-exercise
-the Goob driving to Batavia to pick up batting for his Eagle project and buttons for his vest for the multi-stake prom that night
-kids running to the MAAC (our thrift store from heaven here in Medina)
-minimal jobs for healthiness*--including that 6 foot high pile of laundry...only a slight exaggeration.
-running to market for food
-Mom being available for dance prep by 2 pm
-start the sewing of quilt tops
-Q-dawg getting in enough work so that he could not drown when Monday rolls around
-visit to a neighbor to fix a screen door (didn't happen that I know of...crazy!)
-Q-dawg trying to fix his broken windshield wipers, since wipers are so essential in our never-ending winter
-specialized cleaning for certain areas that really couldn't be left.
-eating?
-piano lesson for youth in neighborhood
-making dinner for friends and the missionaries.

Well, the war room prep was just enough to keep up on our toes, despite the unforeseen infiltration of the one-baby demolition crew. (See older post about Zulie.)   The Goob, Liliputian and Chugger-dude made it off to the dance with a delightful group of friends on time with me madly sewing on the buttons and doing make-up moments before departure. (See pictures on Instagram.**)  The little ones got to go on a whirlwind trip to the store, with money-bags Papaya in heaven after doing allowance with me before she went (because why not add something else, right??).

Q-dawg was able to finish up his work to give him that head start, although he did finish after 10 pm because he came up to save dinner instead of working.  Lek jumped in too, both with cooking and helping bring in groceries with Piper, Hava and Maia.  The piano lesson was brief, the conversation delightful and full of laughs and the food oh so good!!
Tex Mex Chicken Skillet

And we had Happiness Cookies to top it all off, followed by a game of Categories with a "spoon full of water" and a message with the missionaries

Whew!
Q-dawg and I had a great skype talk with Avot, who is away at college in Idaho figuring out her life, (squeeze in there 5 books read aloud to the littles,) finished up the dishes that Lek had done more than half of despite my insistence on splitting it down the middle, and then settled in front of "The Fugitive" to finish it up with Lek and Q-dawg.  My blood pressure is rising just thinking about it!

Days like that are fortunately few and far between these days.  Normally I have minimal accounting to anyone's schedule but our own and, boy, can I tell you how ready I am for this Sabbath day??

And the laundry was folded and put away.


*our new motto at our house is to make cleaning not the most important priority to leave space for creating, or in other words "see how dirty we can be and still be healthy."
**if I post pictures on Instagram they automatically fill up "Chatbooks" that are printed for my scrapbooks for family history.  Cha-ching!  Feel free to tell them I recommended you.  I love 'em!

Zulie Already in Terrible Twos??

It was 3:30 pm.  I was finishing up sewing a quilt top for one of the Goob's 15 Eagle Scout project quilts.  The house was relatively calm.

I still had some shopping to do before the sister missionaries came for dinner along with some dear friends.  One of the sisters is from Texas and had missed her Tex Mex so I had googled a recipe that I was looking forward to making.

Enter Zulie.

Bag of chips: dumped on the floor and stomped on.

As I went to clean it up, I noticed the waft of poopy diaper.  Later!  I hurried to sweep up the chips.

Container of Ajax Bleach: half of it happily dumped out on the front rug, as Zuli appreciates the way the puffs waft up in blue clouds.
Potted plant above the couch: scooped out all over the bookshelf and back of the couch and in between cushions.
Container of colored pencils left out by Papaya who is sweetly vacuuming up all the dirt off the couch: dumped out all over the other rug, complete with all the shavings from previous sharpenings.
Container of colored pencils left out by Mommy as she went to try and put the quilt blocks away before Zuli got to those: dumped out again.

All this happened in under half an hour.  Terrible twos here we come!  

Q-dawg's Update on Chugger-dude

Hello Everyone,

I just wanted to fill you all in on Hyrum's condition and to thank you for all of your thoughts and prayings. 

We went to the hospital on January 7th for Hyrum's surgery. After they put him in his hospital gown the anesthesiologist came in to put an IV in his arms so they could put him to sleep for the 3- to 4-hour surgery. After his arm was banded and the anesthesiologist prepared to insert the IV, Hyrum's face turned green and he got nauseous. Change of plan. They wheeled Hyrum off to the the OR and sent Mary and I to the waiting room. In the OR, they gave Hyrum some laughing gas which got him in the mood to handle the IV being injected into his arm. They started putting him to sleep and the surgeon told Hyrum that he was going to hear a pop. Hyrum heard, "You are going to hear a pop, pop, pop, pop...pop...pop.....pop...zzzzzzzzzz"

During the next four hours the surgeon put two screws through Hyrum's left lower femur growth plates to stop them from growing. He also put a screw through the inside growth plate of his lower right femur. This was to prevent a greater disparity between his leg lengths from occurring since his growth plate on the outside of his lower right femur had already ceased functioning. All those screws were the easy part and only took 9 stitches overall to close. 

The major part of the surgery was to cut open his right leg, saw his femur in half and insert a bone wedge (acquired from the bone bank- who knew?) to straighten his leg. A metal plate was screwed into place to hold the bone wedge in place until it is integrated into his femur. His leg was then closed with 15 staples and put into a cast from his hip to his ankle. 

When Hyrum started waking up after the surgery Mary and I were allowed to return. He was wheeled up to his recovery room. We were told he would spend one to two nights in the hospital, depending on how well he was able to bear and manage the pain. He enjoyed watching movies and choosing whatever he wanted from the hospital menu. He ordered an apple and received a bruised, squishy yellow oblong fruit that looked and tasted like a banana. Poor kid. He only puked up his guts once. He enjoyed peeing into a portable plastic urinal. Like any hospital stay I've experienced, we were awakened every half hour throughout the night by the nurse, the nurse's assistant, the nurse's assistant's assistant, the anesthesiologist, the respiration therapist, the proctologist, the cardialogist, the janitor, the birthing specialist, a homeless man named Dan, and anybody else who happened to be in the hospital all coming in at staggered intervals with a happy, bubbly "HELLO!, I REALIZE IT IS 2AM (or 2:25, or 3:07 or 3:10, etc), BUT I JUST WANTED TO INTERRUPT YOUR (AND YOUR DAD'S) HIGHLY BENEFICIAL SLEEP TO LET YOU KNOW IF YOU NEED ANYTHING (BESIDES SLEEP), I'M HERE TO HELP. BYE!"

The following morning Hyrum received his crutches and- with flying colors- conquered the physical challenges placed before him by the physical therapist. We were given the okay to go home, or the option to stay until the pain was manageable/bearable. With strong encouragement from sleep-deprived dad, he chose to go home. He was given three pain killers of three increasing potentials: Ibuprofen for swelling and soreness, something with a weird medical name to be taken regularly to help with stronger pain, and something else with a weird medical name to be taken only when the pain became unbearable. 

The next few days were full of conversations like, "Hyrum how is the pain?" "Fine." "Do you need any pain killer?" "Okay." "Hyrum, did you take your Ibuprofen this morning?" "Sorry, I forgot." "Hyrum, even if your leg doesn't hurt you need to take the Ibuprofen for swelling." "Okay."

I broke my leg once playing football- just a hairline fracture in my fibula- and I could have used one of those painkillers with the weird medical names. So thank you for all of your kind thoughts and fasts and prayings on Hyrum's behalf. I have no doubt that their impact has been great in Hyrum's recovery. 

Since his surgery his staples have been pulled and he now has a bright green cast with all sorts of messages from his friends/family. He will be losing the cast in a few weeks and will start physical therapy (more than the air-writing of the alphabet with his toes he does now) which will continue for four or five months, gradually increasing the weight he puts on his leg and the range of motion and strengthening of muscles until he is cleared for sports around June. Yay! We could use him on the basketball court. 

Thanks for everything,

Quinn

Things I am grateful for

I am grateful for this house:
-for the experience of laying the insulation, knowing that I was wrapping my family in warmth with each panel;
-for what we have learned about home construction and ourselves during the building process;
-for how I learned to trust more deeply when my life was in chaos around me;
-how I learned that my happiness doesn't have to depend upon order, cleanliness or completion;
-for the river that runs behind our house and the park next door...how I can walk into my backyard and feel like I am in the wilderness...in the middle of the city;
-for the bright yellow kitchen that stays so warm and for all the memories we have created in it;
-for the long dining room table that was such a miracle to find that morning garage sale-ing, when my logic said go right and the Spirit said go left...and there it was;

I am grateful for the Spirit:
-that can guide me in all things God needs me to do;
-for my understanding of how God works with me. Someone counseled me recently that God doesn't tell us everything we need to do but that we need to be acting and counsel with Him when we need to.  Oh no, my friend, that is not how it works for me...for you see: My mind, my body, my will is always going.  I seek to have God as the ever-present rudder in my course.  Do I need to be compelled to do good things?  No. I do them all the time. I can fill my life with enough good things to satisfy even the most zealous list-making perfectionist, for that is what I am recovering from being.  No, what I need is to seek Him first in all things and then teach myself to act on His things first, and in His time.  He is not worried about me being compelled in all things, that slothful servant warned against in Doctrine and Covenants 58.  He knows that I am a compulsive doer--my greatest strength and my greatest weakness.   The Spirit needs to be ever-present so that as I go through all those good things I default to every day--for I am always planning, always adjusting, always optimizing--He can slow me down, stop me, confirm me, or redirect me.  And consecrate my performance to my soul. (2 Nephi 32:9)
-to help me sense if something is amiss in my children, as it is with one of them now. One of them is teetering and at a point of decision...
-that has led us to Hungary, to New York and (my favorite of all), to my husband;

I am grateful for my children:
-what they have taught me about myself by interactions that have brought out my weaknesses (you wouldn't believe how perfect I knew I was before I started parenting!)
-how they have shown me glimpses of how God loves His own children;
-for the way they snuggle with me;
-forgive me;
-support me;
-sense when I am sad and serve me;
-let me love and serve them when they are happy and sad;
-for what we have learned together of the world, science, history, math, English and so much more!
-for the activities we do together--painting, hiking, sports, reading...oh, reading time!
-for the thousands of hours that we have spent reading together, for the times they begged for "just one more chapter..."
-for the way they love and serve each other...and forgive and have hope
-for what Liliputian has taught me about loving, suffering with
-for what Pipalicious has taught me about serving without thought of reward
-for what the Goob has taught me about truth
-for what Chugger-dude has taught me about enduring well...and perfectly living the role of an older brother to his two little buddies
-for the way they make me laugh
-for how Avot told me so many times that I am doing better than I think I am;
-for my little buddy Spooner who snuggles super small in my lap and tells me how much he loves me
-for Zuli and Zsa-Zsa who have taught me how to have compassion with their eyes and body language...to see how healing can be so instinctive;
-for Lek, for showing me my weaknesses
-for Papaya, and reflecting back my zeal for living truth--and how much it hurts when there is not truth around us;
-for Hava--for being so much like me and seeing what it must look like from the outside...for teaching me how to love myself
-for Isaa-boo who taught me about the Atonement, who broke down the perfectionist facade I was struggling to keep up, who made the Resurrection and afterlife a reality;
-for scrapbooks full of memories.

I am grateful for trials:
-for how they have hollowed out and expanded my soul
-for what they have taught me about myself,
-and God, who tests me just enough to refine me but fills my life with as much beauty and peace as He can without ruining me;
-and my Savior, who suffers with me, cleanses me, and heals me;
-for the way they have taught me compassion with those who have suffered death, depression, darkness so thick it is suffocating;
-for the way they have put the things in perspective which are the most important;
-for bed bugs, lice and pinworms that taught me relate-ability and that these things can happen to even clean people who try really hard to get rid of them;
-for depression that helps me enjoy when I feel peace and joy;
-whether by my own making or externally created, for the way they help me break out of my self-righteous, prideful statue of self.

I am grateful for Quinn:
-for his endurance;
-for his humor, even if he makes me laugh when I don't want to (I am so much like Hava!);
-for the way he looks when he holds that newborn baby or when he holds me when I am suffering and he doesn't know how to fix it;
-his sincerity in his prayers and blessings, his hushed and gentle and reverent voice as he speaks with God or speaks for God;
-the way he can enjoy the moment, enjoy not being always a doer;
-the way he loves my cooking and tries so hard to make me happy;
-the way he wrestles with his boys and schools his kids (in more ways than one) on the field and on the court;
-the way he demonstrates gentlemanliness and sportsmanship;
-the way his cello sounds in the quiet times of the evening;
-the way he brightens up the world of facebook...and how he shares his witticisms with me with a dramatic flair :D;
-for all the memories we have together--places we've been, people we've met, things we have done;
-the way he can hike with two kids and a big pack on his back for miles without seeming effort!
-for his sensibility with finances;
-for his exquisite poetry that he has composed over the years;
-for the music and movies, the inspiration and heroes, that he has brought into my life;
-for the way he always, always takes care of us--whether getting up to start the fire when camping, setting up the tent, providing this home, getting the van started and cleaned off...all without complaint or request;
-for the occasional diaper that he changes ;);
-for the crazy and creative memories that he makes, like the Polar Bear Plunge;
-for the many crazy and creative traditions that have arisen through his creativity--the call to Family Home Evening, the Dinner Time Quiz, the sound-off as we leave to go anywhere in a vehicle (after forgetting a couple kids over the years...)
-for the way he accepts everyone on their terms and is so "chill" about life (as the Goob would put it)
-for the way he wrestles with his boys and protects his girls (having their dates sign a shot-gun shell might be a trifle overdone :)?)

I am grateful for the many people over the years:
-who have touched and taught me
-at Yale, for the perspective and globalism, a sense of the world community I was in;
-a few adults as I grew up who saw enough of me to reach out and connect
-my parents, of course, for their sacrifice, examples and patience in dealing with one of the most obstinate and opinionated people I know
-for the way they taught me little things like sweeping under the edges of the cupboard fronts and the importance of family scripture reading and bedtime routine
-for my brothers who I so undervalued and have come to cherish from afar, wishing I had done more with them when I was with them
-for the delightful, colorful and real people that my brothers have brought into the family...all of whom have taught me and loved me in return
-for my second parents who have loved me as one of their own as I have demonstrated some pretty ugly sides over the years
-for the way they not only cared for me and accepted me after killing their grandson, but nurtured me when I felt so dark and distressed.  I still remember riding in their car on the way to go and dress Isaak for burial, huddled against the door, and feeling their compassion and concern for me.
-truly for the Biesingers and all that have come and gone with them...I am amazed at how God not only knew the brothers I needed to grow up with but as I became more aware of the value and role of family as I started my own, I learned from, laughed with and came to love them all just as much as the brothers I was born with.  I am not sure how that works, but I am grateful for it.
-for the fun memories of camping with family over the years--the brawls and the laughs altogether
-for my beloved Kearns ward, that crucible of fire that included some of the most loving, accepting people I have ever met in my life as I went through those challenging young parent years with beloved mentors and as I went through years of the darkest depression I had known up to that time, even outside of the loss of our dear boy;
-for the people of Utah valley that I served with in the homeschool community...ahhhh...my second family.  Oh, how much I learned together with you as we sought what was best for our children and came together to make it happen!  And somehow, along the way, we refined our parenting, our communication skills...became a little closer to being (or at least seeing) the people God wants us to become;
-for the dear, real and rich people of Hungary and western New York--rich in emotion, experience and love. Hungary, you have taught me love without language. Western New York, you have embraced and sheltered and neglected me in just the right ways to help me love and accept myself and God's love for me just a little bit more.
-for the people who have shown me extreme versions of my faults and the effect
-for the people who have inspired me to be more loving, trusting, and hopeful

I am grateful for:
-modern medicine and it's innovation
-herbal and traditional cures and their purity
-essential oils--for Breathe that helps me, well, breathe  and for the humor the discussion of them brings into our home
-movies that inspire and those that produce them
-music that inspires and people who share it with me
-books that inspire and couches to snuggle up and read them in
-a piano to play
-books by the thousands to read (and pack-up) (and go through meticulously when we had bedbugs two years ago...sigh)

I am grateful for the Gospel:
-for a Church that teaches it in its purity in the scriptures and when moved upon by the Spirit from the pulpit
-for temples and temple work and the many blessings that come from being engaged in that process
-for the sacred experiences I have had, the sacred peace I have felt, the sacred truths I have learned within their white walls;
-for the knowledge that I can learn all truth and see how it fits together
-for a Savior of whom all things testify...even cracks in the sidewalk and buds on a plum tree;
-for prophets who have recorded their experiences to bring me scriptures that have changed my life incredibly
-for repentance, the Sacrament and the Atonement that cleanse, heal and renew me as regularly as I let them
-for the hope and love inherent in God's plan for us
-for the way the people and the leaders have taught me and continue to teach me to serve and look with more love at those around me and myself.

I am grateful for homeschooling!
-the way I get to learn with my kids
-for what I have learned about mission, learning styles, and what an education should really be directed towards: creating life-long learners that know that they can effect change in the world and in their own lives
-to find and connect my children with the tools that will unleash their souls to greatness!
-to see the way my children bless and be blessed by, teach and learn from, serve and be served by so many others in the process
-to see the spark of "ah-hah!" when something kindles or is made clear in their minds
-to see them endure and persist when the "ah-hahs" don't come
-to see them be so individualistic in needs and demands and see them grow into themselves
-to be a front row spectator and sometimes participant in the process!
-to go hiking, swimming, exploring, reading, resting, painting, cooking, traveling, serving, working, building and destroying together...and know that we can learn from it all;
-to see them progress and succeed despite and perhaps a little because of my weaknesses and the trials I put them through
-to change my definition of "success" from an unrealistic "ideal" finish-line goal to a beautifully healthy and realistic bundle of potential as the end result;
-for how it taught me all that I cannot do...and to be okay with it. (Still working on that one.)

I am grateful for technology:
-for how it helps with family history: connecting us with ancestors, fellow workers and the temple all with a couple strokes of the keyboard
-for how it helps with my personal family "history": typing in my journal, blogging, Facebook to "catch up" with others, letter writing, printing off newsletters;
-for the music and media I can access to bring truth and the Spirit into my home
-navigation...wow.  So grateful for google maps!
-access to information: recipes, facts, maps, testing sites (Seterra and Duolingo, current personal favorites!), news...endless!
-prezis, educational videos, humor, youtube for uploading family videos...amazing!

I am grateful for:
-my clothes
-my bed on the floor next to the man I love
-my books
-my family
-my friends
-my days
-quiet nights
-quiet mornings
-excited greeting hugs
-going to bed snuggles
-aromas of Thanksgiving-like feasts from the kitchen
-warm gooey cookies fresh off the pan
-Argentina and my extreme emotional refiner's fire it was
-people who give me something to live for
-the Spirit
-second chances
-chocolate
-yummy healthy food
-friends that encourage and love me...so many
-friends that inspire me...many more!
-friends that seek to understand me...few but choice
-brainstorming...