Lightsabers, kittens, and motherhood advice

 Yes, I’m posting at 3:00 AM. I totally started laughing when I had to crawl across a light saber to reach a tissue. I thought “I wouldn’t trade this for anything.”

All too soon this stage will be gone: this stage of five-year-olds and light sabers, unwanted litters of kittens that inflame my allergies, getting up at odd hours with a child who has bed wetting problems and no end in sight. 

-Lyme disease in my baby from tics likely acquired by choosing to live in my dream place of a forest; 

-orthodontist appointments that I spend two hours at while we do a carpooling dance with two older children, their jobs and a car in the shop; 

-wishing I could be there to honor my Isaak at his grave on Memorial Day—or any day— and loving my family for doing it for me; 

-torturing my living children with gardening just enough to feel plagued by the garden but not enough to actually yield much fruit 😂; 

-“forced family fun” (or F-cubed as Quinn so cleverly put it) where my kids have to play games with me off my choosing…mwa ha ha ha 😈.

After thirteen children and 29+ years of almost constant motherhood, a few things have made it easier to enjoy these moments—or at least laugh at them— in my “advanced geriatric maternal years” as my last OB/GYN so “ lovingly” labeled them:

-the gentle reminders i’ve heard for years from women further along my path to “enjoy the moments”;

-the sadness and loss in my mother heart at seeing my babies grow older and leave the nest blended with the joy in seeing the humans that they become;

-saying “no” to so many “essentials”…laundry being done, organized sports, video games, manicured yard, dinner on time or even something besides leftovers 😂, being the final word in my children’s lives as they grow older…although I will argue that Eli at 10 needs me still far more than he will acknowledge, and Xai at 13 definitely benefits from a little hygiene and fashion advice (conversation literally last night—“at least one color from your shirt and one color from your pants should match”);

-letting go of the expectations that (1) cooking dinner and wiping their cute little bums will ever make my children love me; (2) even if I’m logical, the aforementioned tiny humans won’t acknowledge it, despite being recently trained in  recognizing fallacies; (3) I should be good at being patient and calm “after all these years.”;

-increased awareness of my existence as a human, as a woman, outside of my role of a mother – – allowing myself to slip out of the worn out role of exhausted mother servant to assume my rightful place as an intentional human being with needs that deserve filling and  replenishing… and not only so I have more to give, but because my worth is not only because of what I give but in who I am.

Yeah…no regrets.

Well maybe a couple:

-being horribly domineering to a friend and forever damaging a relationship;

-thinking transporting lattices on top of the car wouldn’t scratch it…. Sorry, Quinn 😏.

Creatures: macroscopic and microscopic varieties

 It’s been a nuts week already! First, on her morning run, Maia came across a dead momma possum (and she assured me it wasn’t just playing possum bc one of its eyes were missing, it had flies on it and she poked it and it didn’t move) but there were four baby possums struggling beside it.

After a couple of hours of the moral dilemma and a reference to a “local” wildlife rehabilitation place, Maia and the younger ones retrieved the babies carefully and we spent the next several hours with the “local” experts figuring out how to proceed.

Drew and Hava ended up driving around two hours round trip to meet up with a lady to drop them off.

Then after a restless night with Penelope—who had to switch antibiotics for Lymes disease bc of an allergic reaction—Liesl came in from a 4 am bathroom trip exclaiming, “Mom! There’s a bat in the room!!”

Enter Dad to the rescue while the four of us in that room made a quick escape to the front room where we “slept” the rest of the night. (Apparently, Liesl—who was sleeping “feet to feet” with me,overlapping—straightens her legs REALLY fast when she sleeps and kicked me solidly in the stomach a few times before I adjusted enough to remedy that. 😜)

Eventful two days!

(We were able to connect with a "local" wild animal rehabilitation center by driving an hour to meet up. We received word that they are doing well! Penelope is also learning to swallow whole pills like a champ and her allergic reaction is going down. They want to take her to a rheumatologist to make sure it's all good, eventually.)

Lyme's Disease, End of School Year Fun, and BIG SIBS!!

Penelope found a hang nail and was a cute little poser with it.

Xai is quite the sous chef. I love cooking with him in the kitchen.

Havala posed for her simulation picture--the silly vesion.

I wanted to use this for her real one...actually, maybe we did, lol.

I was able to visit Lily, who is stationed in Hawaii with the love of her life, Michael.  This parrot was a street vendors way of earning a fast buck, but I'm not that sorry that we went for it. The picture is great!

When we went bowling together, we met this cool lady who had "Nightmare Before Christmas" pants.  This is a favorite movie of some of our family, so I asked her for a picture and she graciousy consented :D.

One can never have too many pictures of adorable grandchildren.

Or of adorable children of friends who visit. I had a sweet arrangement with a lady in our ward:  we would swap kids every week or so--all the younger kids would go to her house for the day, or they would all come to my houes for the day. It was such a blessing!  They got along so well.

The girls noticed how dashing Eli looked in this picture. He's sporting long hair lately--he and Xai, who is trying to grow his long enough so he can get a perm.

Here we were capturing a rare productive moment together.  Often people are in different corners of the house--Maia up doing her art, Havala her piano and calculus, Xai his math, reading and imagination, Eli, Liesl and Penelope outside or fighting, lol.  Penelope has also basically taught herself how to ride her bike....on the crazy hill-ish area by our house!!  She's nuts.

Several people wored together to make Lucky the Lake Monster happen for our last play. This is one of many stages, with Liesl and my mom (who did a LOT of the work!!)

Video chats are fun--this is one of Dad in Hungary sporting a cool hoodie that Kelka bought for The Goob...the more random the better. It was fun to have Pipalicious and Tova on the call, too.

Dad had a WONDERFUL time in Hungary with some super cute grandchildren and Kelka.

We tried out a local Mexican restaurant where a friend in the ward works. It was delicious--even Liesl's hamburger, crazy girl.  

Dogpiling: one of the "cheers" we give each other after a presentation in Vanguard. They each had their own and it was super fun.

Selfie of Penelope and I gallavanting together.

Maia and her friend Xander were willing to do a little dance for our last play.

Here is Lucky in action!

Eli got a fun role as a pirate~

And I don't have one as Liesl as a parrot, but she was amazing!

Here is Liesl and Lily exchanging happy faces--they both warm my heart so very much! I couldn't have picked a better man to love my Lily and it brings me such joy to see her so very happy!

I have the kiddos take pictures EVERY DAY of when they take care of any animals, because it seems like important things like water get forgotten. I love that this one included a selfie with a smile of my sweet and spunky Xai.

Speaking of sweet and spunky, here he is from the play :D!

We really enjoyed a wonderful visit from Quinn's parents at the beginning of May. They were so sweet to come and visit! We enjoyed games, going out to eat, going on walks and just spending time together.

Another one of those sweet selfie shots.

Havala dyed her hair for the play and I love it!  She is getting too old too fast: ready for college and mission soon!  This summer is our last with her at home and it's really sinking in.  Saying goodbye never gets easier.  Fortunately she is doing what Hyrum did with a senior semester, hoping to head out at the beginning of 2027.

Xai captured a few shots of us during our Thursday night basketball one night.

I'm not the best but it is still FOR SURE one of my favorite ways to exercise.

Xai sung a song from Frozen as Olaf for our end of the year choir performance and got these super snuggly pajamas as his take home prize.  He loves to give warm hugs and I love to get them.

We met an old neighbor from Kaysville last week when our newest elder showed up in our area.  He's VERY good at basketball, but we still have fun.  It was fun for his mom to get this picture!

Our sweet Love, for the kids to enjoy later.

Maia and I went to go see a movie and saw this poster...and thought of Lily, lol. (She hates baby Grogu.)

My lovely Tova...I love that she is close and we got to work together on Remarkable so very much!

And we have four new kittens, too. 

Today Drew was teaching parkour to the kids at the back of the church parking lot.  We love having him home for so many reasons.  He's planning on living local, which will be nice.

We enjoyed a quick game of Blokus this morning after my mom and dad and Xai helped us make one complete set from two incomplete sets.  Voila!

....and just in case you were wondering about the title, Penelope has complained off and on about extreme leg pain. I chalked it up to growing pains but this last bout seemed worse.  Sure enough: all four tests for varying degrees/types of Lyme's disease came back POSITIVE. She is on medicine and is finally walking again...almost normally!  And she even started riding her bike again....and then crashed and skinned up both knees.  Yikes.  Hopefully tomorrow will be better <3.