1/26
Volleyball last week was SO fun!! We had only two of the fam (Maia and I) to represent, but Josephine, Mark, the Brooks and two elders came and one of the elders was GOOD. Elder Oliver. It was fun. We didn’t do basketball because Quinn and Havala were out of town and the week before that was super low in numbers even with them.
Last week was a pretty social week! I met up with Erica B and Josephine with the younger kids at the library on Tuesday while the teens did an art class with a local lady. That was AMAZING…meeting with E&J. We laughed, cried, shared parenting experiences. It was beautiful and Josephine and I started up a swap of kids! I totally took hers for this Friday afternoon and I’m looking forward to sending my youngest three to hers. The kids ran amok, helped my kiddos with jobs, played some kind of outdoor back and forth search game. I played a few games with them. King of Tokyo was one of them and Eli rolled five attacks two turns in a row in Tokyo while he and Xai were in there and wiped Darren, Liesl and I out in two rounds. Yikes!
It’s been fun to play more games, watch more movies and still be doing the things that are important. I love this selfcare, God-inspired system. It gives me a lot more direction–especially when I trust it enough to relax into it and not over-think it. I think that over-thinking takes up SO much time!
Post from “The Delicious Life of Pipalicious”: Every so often, one of the little kids comes upstairs to join me for online seminary (it starts at 6:30 am). Well, this morning it was Xai.
He snuggled up by me and made a lot of suggestions like: "You should turn off your camera," or "You should rename yourself 'I am your best friend!'" Then I had to ask him to be a little quieter because I was turning on my mic and he conceded and scooted closer to me. After I finished and turned off my mic, he bellowed out "I WOULD LIKE TO BEAR MY TESTIMONY..." Such a cute guy:D
1/27
Wow, two days in a row!
We’ve had a decent snow storm–nothing really over the top other than the ensuing bitter cold. It was a mite hilarious to see the shelves of Aldi so bare in the days leading up to it, the poor haggard employees. Kroger had more items, but the employees looked like they were ready to join the rest of us in hibernating as the storm rolled in. I found some great chicken, much to Maia’s dismay, and bought 20 large packages of chicken breasts. It was a great moment for her to confront her social anxiety, she told me later.
I had quite a few social experiences last week. It was good. It felt good–to be with other women, to have community. I had “coffee” (herbal tea) with Tabby Blaney for a solid couple of hours while we played Scrabble…super fun! I had a women’s game night with my mom, Merilee Meyer, Lisa Weyand, and Katelyn Balli and played a couple of fun games. I did that book group I mentioned in Lily’s letter, had a kids and moms meet up at the church where a couple moms came. It was good. But a little much for one week, lol. I am glad for this week to just be snuggled inside.
The kids have been enjoying the snow for the past two afternoons/evenings and I’ve been enjoying the quiet. I realized that I like the quiet as long as there is a promise of noise to come. But maybe I can be okay with the quiet eventually? I did reach out to Piper and Hyrum, did some Marco Polos with Drew and Piper, video chatted with Kel and his cute fam and reconnected with Tova last night. I’ll be sending this on to Lily, bless her. We are looking forward to seeing her for a short period of time later this month for her graduation, so that will be fun!
I just sent three explosive darlings out on an adventure. Between the awesome Come Follow Me video about aspiring for a Zion-like community and the book I’m reading, “Crucial Conversations” about avoiding violence, silence, being a victim and villain in my dialogue, the whole thing went much better than EVER! I stopped myself from going to violence (or retreating from it when I overstepped) by recognizing the indicators of violence in my conversations or the emotions I was feeling. One time–at the escalating moment between Eli and I between threats and counter-threats–I stopped, recognizing what I had done and felt an immediate urge to go and hug Eli super tightly. This recommendation by a friend recently was inspired as I felt Eli’s tension gradually leave his body as I tightly squeezed the little turkey to my chest.
That (and several other instances just this morning, where I think I would have normally gone to what was identified as “violence” in *conversation) were little victories towards a more Zion-like environment already! I also realized that I resort to "violence" in my conversations WAY too much. (It's based upon the stories I tell myself after facts happen...a real thing! It's a great book.)
*In this book, “violence” in conversations is anything belligerent, domineering, “I must win,” coercive, manipulative, etc
Here they are, happily going on their adventure next door (these are two pictures side by side):
Penelope is carrying a loaf of fresh bread to my mom, Liesl has a backpack full of her math and literature supplies with an 18 count of fresh eggs tied across her chest and Eli is walking Love while carrying his math. Normally, I would say this is a very explosive arrangement, but it’s already looking way better than usual, and I LOVE that they get this memorable moment! What a cool thing. Sure it’s almost 11, but WOW have we gone through a bunch of emotional challenges and not only weathered them and learned from them! Maia has shoveled off the top layer of new snow from our hill driveway, Havala made most of the bread this morning–it was DELICIOUS, and we have had devotional and some world news. I call that a win.
Sure I have doctors appointments to schedule–including one to prep for my colonoscopy, an appointment I missed because of all of this glorious snow. I have other whatevers, but part of my new mental health is not holding myself accountable for all of those things I haven’t done, acknowledging that I am making great, intentional kind choices and that it’s totally great if things fall apart around me. I’m okay with it. I’ll do what I can, but moms aren’t meant to be the catch-all saviors of those around them. There is only one Savior and He is immortal. I’m not and my happiness and sanity and bliss are all okay to weave into my messy life–and I’m allowed to enjoy the mess.
As you can see from the pictures, we are enjoying some snow…some of us enjoying it more than others, lol. After two weeks of solid encampment, some are getting a little stir crazy, Shifting around locations for some events and canceling others has been a little nuts. We canceled/postponed our dinner theater we were going to do next weekend because I just can’t get staging, etc to the venue. We also didn’t have many people sign up, so that was a thing!
Xai is busily working on one of many prezi/canva projects for Vanguard (he’s doing so well with those!); Havala is plowing away at her college Prep pre-calculus and Chemistry classes, along with advancing her piano and voice skills with lessons at the local university. It’s been hard for her to have to make adjustments to her schedule to accommodate work (or no work), social stuff and school. I’m proud of her. She’s doing well. I rarely see the recluse Maia during the day, but I got to see her dancing in the snow as she shoveled, and that was precious. She has such a beautiful spirit! And she does love her room, her little paradise area, which I am happy for. She enjoyed goofing off with her friends last night at Les Mis, which is so good for her. We’ve been talking a lot about interacting with others, realistic expectations (no expectations are best with lots of appreciation!)...the usual young adult quest to find people to be comfortable with. I keep emphasizing that the main part is to enjoy herself, being herself and try to just enjoy people with a huge helping of grace. I love that so much of what we listen to and watch reinforce what I feel prompted to teach her–like God and I are team teaching, which fortunately, we are :D.
